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My distance is set to the smallest at 30 miles away. I’m not going to end up in one of their commercials. Pass this along to anyone that’s thinking about doing eharmony.com, it’s your American duty. I called and spoke to a guy, and all he could say was “all I can do is refer you to the email”, he literally said that like 7 times.

My math might be wrong, but I’m pretty sure LA is farther than 30 miles from San Diego. I guess I have to find another way to waste money on girls that aren’t making out with me per month. That’s all he could say, and read off his script, when I asked him, but WHY was my account canceled.

What the fuck are they doing with all the money I give them each month!?

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That’s always kind of awkward when you’re supposed to be “working”. You’re going to continue reading without telling any of your hot female co-workers? I had some other titles in work for this blog, but they just didn’t capture the essence of what I was trying to say. A “computer” matches you up based on “29 levels of compatibility”, which I’m fine with. Because you’re thinking, wow some super computer down at Eharmony headquarters is crunching vectors and differential equations just to find my perfect mate, and everyday you log in and see new matches, that you think are hand picked from the computer gods above.

I mean, I feel bad if you’re at work right now reading this, and the biggest letters on your screen involve the words FUCK YOU. So after you completed their riddles and questions, you then can start receiving “matches”, hurray!

You don’t even notice that she hasn’t responded because your distracted by the new excitement of these new matches.

But then, you start realizing, wait a minute, no ones responding back to you.

So everyday since I’m up at midnight, I log in and get my 7 new exciting matches. That’s active, open, matches, that I’ve sent my multiple choice questions over to, and I’m patiently waiting for their response. In ADDITION to the 748 matches I am currently waiting for a response for, I have also 436 archived matches and 721 matches I’ve closed out. So you’re saying I matched on 29 levels of compatibility with almost 2000 women in San Diego?

So before you know it, you’re waiting on 5 girls to respond back, and then it’s 10, then 20, then 50! As of tonight I was in stage 1, waiting for 748 matches to respond back to me from stage 1. You’re probably thinking Steven, you should be more selective anyways, you can’t just be communicating with every person you get matched with. So all together I have been matched with 1905 and different females. Or whats more likely is you sent me every girl in San Diego in 7 girl increments.

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Two dates where I was probably settling, compromising and giving in, just to go on dates. Not at all, they were perfectly normal, fine people, just not the match for me. It’s literally a 40 minute survey asking you the same question 37 different ways.

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